Strange Worlds Recipes

Please give a warm welcome for my guest Hank Quense. He’s back with another post, this one is a recipe I’m not quite sure about; but hey, I’m a Canuck and we’ve only ever had roadkill grouse.  The part about the feathers I can attest to, though.

After you pirate borrow Hank’s recipe, stop by if you will and visit me at C. Lee Mckenzie’s blog. Although I’m here, I’m also there talking about the collaborative anthology I wrote with six fellow authors. Yes, I have super powers and can be in two places at once. When my boys were young, that confused them a lot. Now, not so much. 

Strange Worlds Recipes

My name is Burga.  Im warrior-cook.  Adventuring is my profession, but cooking is my passion and I love collecting new recipes to try.
Ive been a few short stories and the author, Hank Quense, has promised me a staring role in a novel, but the schmuck hasnt done anything about it. As a consequence, I have to share my recipes to get coins to buy spices and herbs. 
Below are two of my best recipes in my collection.

Lily Pad Bundles
No elfin feast ever begins without these delightful bundles. Cuisine: Elfin
Course: Appetizer
Burga Says: A refreshing change from ‘ordinary’ appetizers.  The pond scum lends a tasty piquant flavor.A good elf buddy of mine and me swapped a dozen recipes recently and this was one I got.  They make a great appetizer although non-elves often get sick from eating the bundles.
Time: One hour: start to finish
Servings: Twelve
12 large lily pads
½ pound dried pond scum, chopped
½ pound frog tongues, chopped
1 pound wild onions, chopped
1 pound swamp mushrooms, chopped
1 quart cooking oil
1. Combine all ingredients except lily pads
2. In a heavy skillet, cook mixture until heated throughout
3. Remove from heat and cool.
4. Spread equal amounts of mixture on each lily pad
5. Roll up the lily pad and sealed the ends with a bit of water on a finger tip
6.  Drop into hot cooking oil and cook until lily pads turn golden.
Grilled Road Kill
An alien delicacy from Zaftan 31B.  Don’t try to cook this one in a hurricane.  And don’t ever try to do this indoors. 
Cuisine: Zaftan
Course: Main
Burga Says: Roadkill to Zaftans is a highly-prized delicacy and the presence of a freshly mutilated creature on the roads often sparks murderous disputes, providing even more roadkill
Time: Marinate 8 hours: grill 15 minutes
Servings: Two
1 three pound roadkill roast
1 cup motor oil
1 quart ethanol
1. Don’t bother to skin the meat. Any fur or feathers will burn off in the cooking process
2. If the roadkill isn’t a uniform thickness, bash the thick part with a mallet until it thins out.
3. Combine one cup unused motor oil with one quart ethanol. Pour over meat and marinate overnight.
4. Move a grill at least ten yards from any building. Place meat on grill and pour marinade over it,
5. Ignite the grill using an electric sparked with at least ten feet of cable.
6. When the fire dies down, serve the meat.
My complete collection of recipes is a free download.

Hank Quense is the author of 50 published short stories along with four novels and three collections of stories. All of these are humorous and/or satiric scifi and fantasy. In the non-fiction area, he has over a dozen articles published on fiction writing and he’s the author of the Fiction Writing Guides series and the Self-publishing Guides series. Both series consist of a number of ebooks. The Fiction Writing Guides and the Self-Publishing Guides are an outgrowth of his lectures on both subjects.

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